Settling In…Or Settling Out?

I know what you’re thinking. What the heck does she mean by settling out? You’re right. It makes no sense. Times are so strange. I honestly wish that tomorrow was January 1st, 2021. 2020 has been a wipe, ha ha. Can we just skip to the good part? Anyways, let’s get started.

During COVID-19 everything has changed. Life is still topsy turvy here in NYC and I’m sure it’s crazy elsewhere, too. I’m finally settling in. I’m finally in a groove. This is all taking place…just when we are now starting to talk about re-opening. I’m still getting used to this new normal. I’m not ready to start a new phase of change (although I will have to adapt regardless and I’m prepared to do so). So I’ve settled in…but what about the next part? What about…settling…out? By that I mean how do we progress towards re-opening and changing our way of life for the 2nd time in a very recent period. How do we feel comfortable in such a chaotic and dangerous world/situation? We’ll have no choice. Life must go on, but how do we, in ourselves, prepare ourselves for the unknown and possible danger of the next phase. We must be brave. We must educate ourselves about how to be safe while moving around the city now. What will this new world look like? Will we be quarantined again? So that’s what I mean by settling out. Going out into the world again with whatever confidence in the face of fear that we can after upending our lives by quarantining (which I agree, has been good to do and may be best to continue). For the record, I don’t want the world to go back to the way things were before. Clearly that was not working, and we need to move forward in a different, more positive manner.

Although I am very well aware of the fact that the phrase settling out isn’t a logical term or a regular one, to me it perfectly captures the way that I’m feeling. How are you feeling?

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RDP Friday: Empty

Huh. Empty.

That’s an interesting word.

If anything, I feel,

Anything but empty.

It’s weird.

I’m isolated right now,

For the most part,

As are many of us.

But empty?

Not so much.

It’s more like…

Filled with emotion.

Fear.

Courage.

Strength of personal bonds.

Support from loved ones.

Terror of the unknown.

Thoughts of unease.

Thoughts of love.

My heart is abuzz.

My brain is on fire.

But empty,

As you’d rightfully assume,

That I’d feel,

I don’t.

Maybe it’s because,

There are so many helpers out there.

Here’s to the helpers.

Here’s to the heroes.

Sacrificing their lives,

In order to save ours.